She Did IT, And So Can You!!

 

 

Today’s post is a little different, it is something that I have been planning to do for a while, but life has so many ways of distracting you, I guess….

 

PS: This is NOT  a sponsored post!!!

 

As part of my efforts to support and encourage women who own, operate, and manage their small businesses, I have decided to pick a business each month and introduce the steel woman behind it. This month I have chosen a business that I have personally dealt with. When Adam turned one, it was something that needed to be celebrated! Not only because of the major milestone Adam just achieved, but also because of all what we have accomplished as parents, me and my husband. We felt so proud of all the things we have done the previous year, even though many many times throughout the journey, we were not even sure that we will ever get there. So a big birthday party was called for. Technically I love organising and taking care of all parties we host, but I was already a walking zombie, operating on too much caffeine and very little sleep. My plate was too full to take any more tasks. I came a cross DE PARTY DESIGNS on Facebook (aka google for moms), I contacted Dilu, who has replied promptly, with all the needed details, she also came over to discuss with me how I wanted this party to be like. After explaining to her what I envisaged for my son’s first birthday party,  I just waited anxiously for the final product. The party was a total success, without me going bankrupt, if you are wondering. The fees were very reasonable and totally worth it.


2 years later, I really want to introduce this very motivated, strong and successful woman to every mama reading my blog. To be an example and to also be a reference if you ever need a fabulous party but you have no time or energy to plan it 😉

 

Here is a little chat Dilu and I, had and we would like to share it with you:

Dilu: “I am a mother of 3 beautiful kids who are aged 16, 12 and 9 years. I moved to Bahrain 10 years ago, with my husband’s new job assignment; leaving behind my family and my career which I have been doing for 12 long years. I always believed that family should always stick together, wherever you go or whatever challenges you face in life, so of course I had to follow my husband.

Me: What did you do before Departydesigns?

I used to work in a garment / fabric buying office as a merchandiser and freelance Interior Designer.

How did you start Departydesigns?

After moving to Bahrain I used to work as a freelance Interior Designer, and I started my own page called: D Decor Homes, while writing articles for Interior Design websites like: Look4Design and Amazing Interior Design. With the passion for designing I knew I needed to do something more, something new and not very common in Bahrain. With this idea, I started De Party Designs, and started introducing Candy Table concept, with personalisation, for all the parties, mainly birthday parties, baby showers, bridal showers …etc, going out of the box to create something new every time.

 

 What motivates you to do better every time?

Each and everyday I learn something new from my mistakes, and I want to make it better the next time. The recognition and appreciation towards my work, from people of Bahrain, make me do better and better every time.

 

Was it easy to start a business in Bahrain?

From the beginning I didn’t have any idea of how to start or from where to begin. But as always Bahrain and its people have been amazing to us, and have helped me by providing all the details on how to start up as a home based business, and then make it legalised as another step forward.

 

How do you balance work and family?

I’ve got three amazing independent kids whom have learnt to do most of their work on their own, and always help me to take my work stress out. Also my husband has been immensely helpful in both house-work and my work. He has been the fundamental help, for me to come this far. Even though I am a workaholic, I always make sure we both have plenty of time for our kids, specially towards their education. I also always make sure that I do not go beyond my limits, accepting events due to two reasons, One is : if it interferes with my personal life and my time with my family and kids. Second: I strongly believe whatever I do, I have to do it right and I should not accept many events just for the sake of money. If I can’t have enough time to prepare and deliver something great then there is no way I will commit.

 

What are your plans for the next 5-10 years?

I would love to explore and learn more about different areas and fields of events in Bahrain, as well as in the GCC. At the moment I am looking for more options for expanding my business. At the same time, I love studying about event management in different categories and I will be spending more time on that in the coming years.

 

 What will your advice be for women who would like to start their own business.

I believe if you have a passion for anything you should not hold it back. You need to come out and seek for possibilities of making it work. After living in Bahrain for many years, I have learnt that this is a beautiful country with beautiful people, who are always willing to help and lend you a hand to stand on your own feet. Go out and explore….!!!

 

 

Thank you Dilu for your time and for all the insights and advice!




Facebook: Departydesigns Dpd

Instagram @departydesigns.bh

 

 

 

Ouiam

Birthday Thoughts….


There are things you learn only when you are thirty. Because thirty is the bridge between both worlds: The naivety of the twenties, and how we think we know it all, and the wisdom of the thirties and how each day is a learning experience. Because you are mature enough, wise enough, and most importantly OLD enough to be trusted with some of life’s major secretes.

In few more days, I will be celebrating my 31st birthday and Gosh how I love birthdays! I just love growing and figuring out what life has in store for me. Being thirty was incredibly amazing. It has been filled with so much personal growth, and even though life has gifted me with some hardships, I am still very proud of myself and of how amazing being thirty was.

Being thirty taught me so many new and amazing things. The most important of all is not to be afraid of rejection. I learnt that if someone said “NO” to me, I shouldn’t take it as a setback or a failure, instead, I should look at it as a new source of motivation. Hearing “NO” now is like music to my ears, it makes me step out of my comfort zone, and feel the rush of adrenaline through every inch of my body. The word “NO” now is more of an invitation than it is a rejection. Learning how to accept “NO” and move on was just the beginning of a long delightful story of me getting out of my comfort zone at every step of the way. Being thirty freed me, it liberated me from so many invisible ropes that were tying me down. Now every single day, I look for new challenges. Challenges that will keep me on my toes, that will make my body and mind work hard. In a way it also prepares me for when life strikes, and shows me its other face, the ugly one. It made me a warrior, who wouldn’t fear walking through her path with open arms. Being thirty wasn’t all roses and rainbows. It was full of surprises, good ones, and not so good ones, but still, I have to say, it was my very favorite year ever!

It also taught me how to SAY No! how many times have I found myself cornered in a situation that I hated to be in, but I said YES anyways because I felt forced to, because it wasn’t nice to say NO, because I wanted to please everyone around me. So being thirty taught me that that was plain craziness! The only people I should be struggling to please are:  Myself and my family. “No” has become such a joyful word, instead of it being a source of shame and embarrassment. I say No to things that won’t work for me, I no longer do things that I don’t want to do…. And I am loving it!

Being thirty also taught me a lot about being vulnerable, and how asking for help is our fundamental right and not some kind of cliché that wasn’t for me. I learned that some things in life are only done by asking for help. I learnt that sometimes by asking for help you might also be helping others, and by opening the door you are not only setting yourself free, but freeing other people too.

I learnt this past year the true meaning of friendship. Yes, it took me thirty whole years to figure that out. I have said goodbye to some of my very dear friends, yet we promised each other that we wouldn’t comply with the rule:” Out of of sight, out of mind”. We promised each other that friendship is for life and we kept our words. I feel so thankful and grateful that God made some incredible people cross my path, and linked us forever.

I also finally learnt how to use the GPS!!!!! YES< I DID IT! I never ever thought I am capable of following those very unclear instructions, yet being thirty taught me that I am very much capable of just that! In the last year I have been to places I have never ever been to, in the last 11 years I have been living in Bahrain. I really see this as an “out of this world” accomplishment and I am so very proud of myself!

Being thirty, taught me to only surround myself with people who are going to add value to my life. Whom their presence is going to enlighten me and enrich my life in every aspect, and stay away from negative people, no matter how hard that can be, I just learnt to set rules and boundaries and it worked like a charm!

I learnt to appreciate humor and not to take life too seriously! Face a hardship with a chuckle because you might as well make fun of your miseries, instead of drowning yourself in sorrow.

I also learnt that no matter how painful life can be, no matter how much your heart aches, and your eyes tear, you will eventually smile, because God has gifted us with the epitome of mercy and blessings: The act of forgetting! We forget everything with time and we smile again with a happy heart.

Being thirty was beyond amazing, and I am beyond excited to see what’s in for me next year. What will being 31 teach me, what will life gift me with next year?

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sticking around throughout me being thirty, and for being the best companions in my journey. So much love, positive energy and birthday horns, hats and cheers your way!!

Ouiam

Do You Love Yourself Enough?

How many times have you skipped lunch/ dinner, because you are too busy or too tired to eat? How many times have you deprived yourself from something you really wanted, because of your child? How many times have you pressed the pause button in your life, in order to be a good mother?How many times have smuggled food into the bathroom, so you can eat peacefully? How many times have you left the house with no make up or perfume on, because instead, you chose to wipe butts and have long conversations with tiny horrible bosses. How many times have you cried alone in the middle of the night because your kid just wouldn’t sleep?  I personally have done so much of the above and I am sure you have too.  Someone once described motherhood to me like the oxygen masks in airplanes. Always in the safety demonstration they say that you should put on your OWN mask first, then put your child’s, because if you are not alive you will not be able to save your child; and I couldn’t agree more.   

 

In order to put that mask tightly, you need to know yourself well. You need to speak to yourself with love and love only, you need to value yourself even if no one else does, you need to respect and cherish who you are. To love yourself doesn’t mean to be self-absorbed or narcissistic, it just means that you treat yourself like you want to be treated, that you don’t doubt yourself. It means to forget about any form of self-loathing, and to be able to put yourself as a priority in your own life and not always on the bottom of the list.

 

To love yourself is to know what makes you happy and go for it, be it an hour alone, or a cup of tea with friends, or a relaxing bath. To love yourself is to take care of yourself, exercise, eat healthy, be creative, laugh, and make sure you are living and not just being. You need to know how to satisfy your own needs before you tend to anyone else’s.  At times this might sound like a luxury that you can’t afford, and that’s when you need to practice your fundamental right in this life! ASK FOR HELP! I learnt in the last couple of years that some people are always there for you and are ready to help you whenever you need help. I also learnt that if someone says NO to you, it is not the end of the world, that is probably just the beginning of the journey, and that the amount of NOs that you will hear in your life does not and will not define who you are. So yes honor and respect yourself, don’t wait for anyone else to do it for you! Don’t be the first one to wake up and the last one to sleep EVERYDAY, don’t cancel your plans because the house is messy and needs to be cleaned, don’t allow anyone to treat you as a possession or take you for granted. Love yourself when you wake up in the morning and when you see yourself in the mirror. Love yourself when you allow yourself to breath no matter how hectic the day gets. Just remember:  To survive, you need to put YOUR oxygen mask on first!

 

Ouiam

The Little Story Of a Cupboard…

Today I have a little story to share, something that happened to me and left me a little dazzled and speechless. Something that not only suggests that there is someone up there who rolls the dice, but also that life’s events are all mysteriously and inexplicably connected and intertwined.

Weeks ago I found a great carpenter to build a cupboard for one of the rooms in our new home. He had built few pieces for me in the past, and I knew that he was extremely talented and wasn’t going to charge me an arm and leg for that cupboard. So I told him exactly  what I wanted, the little details I fancied, the knobs, the colours, the partitions, and he agreed. The price was perfect, the design was fabulous and I was over the moon that finally my clothes will have a safe and stylish home to harbour them. He promised to finish the piece of art in 2 weeks, and I knew he would do his best to honor his word, as he always did. 4 weeks later, I still haven’t heard from the man, I called, texted, called again, but no answer! I had given him half of the price we agreed on, and now it seemed like I just got duped. I was more pissed about my homeless clothes, that now are destined to live all over the place, more than anything else. My dreams of having my fabulous white closet have disappeared. Oooh and I also had to start thinking of ways to explain to my dear husband how 200BD has simply vanished!!!!

Long story short, the carpenter was a very decent man, he was in some kind of trouble, he brought the down payment back, and told me that he couldn’t build my closet.  Obviously all hopes of having what I have spent days dreaming of have evaporated!  I gave myself time to mourn, but I moved on, and was convinced that I would just have to live either without a closet, or with a less than OK one, that I am probably going to get from a cheap furniture store.

Weeks have past, and one day while browsing on Facebook, I came across a very talented couple who collect, make, paint, and restore furniture, to sell. They create beauty at its finest. The treasures I have seen on their Facebook page were incredibly stunning. Among these treasures was an old Bahraini cupboard, that they restored and painted, and gave it a taste of sophistication while keeping its authenticity. Without thinking twice, I knew that THAT was MY cupboard and I had to get it. 2 days later the marvelous piece of art, stood tall in my room! That night and when I thought about it, I realized how sad I was over that whole carpenter story and how he couldn’t make the cupboard I dreamed of. I thought I would never get what I wanted, I thought what has happened was incredibly upsetting and disappointing. Little did I know, that the perfect cupboard was somewhere out there, patiently waiting for me to come and make it mine.

The cupboard story is very similar to many many other stories that happen in real life, where we get so overwhelmed and upset when things don’t go the way we want them to. What we don’t know is that somewhere, the perfect thing is waiting. Waiting for us to make peace with ourselves and be ready to invite that perfect thing in our lives. What can seem to be unfair, upsetting, bad, can sometimes be not only good, but great and perfect for us. As the holy Quran says: “Perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you” ( وعسى ان تكرهو شيئا و هو خير لكم) From Surat Al Baqarah.

Ouiam

The Wisdom Of White Papers

Do you remember when you were little? Do you remember how much you knew, how much you trusted, how much you loved, how much you laughed and how much you cried? Of course you do!  Because those were the days you were still close to the doors of knowing… The doors of miracles and mystery.

Everyone says children are born like white papers, and it is our duty as parents to fill those papers with whatever they need to grow up. We teach them to talk, read, write, and to become successful in life; But did anyone try to learn things from those little minds instead of teaching them?

As a kid I believed in clouds and rainbows, I believed I was brave enough to conquer the world, to fly and to be free.  I also seriously believed that I had a hidden talent in understanding animal’s language.. Yes I did. I stayed hours with cats having conversations about life and death. I believed there was always a secrete door, I just needed to look for it harder, I believed I was strong enough to face the world. Suddenly all this believing stopped .. and I grew up! I learned to be afraid of tomorrow, and to never trust strangers, to doubt my own capabilities and skills and to stop asking questions. Yet they say growing up is the best part of life! We grow up and forget the best things we ever knew. We grow up to become boring and scared. We lose our simple selves and become a complicated work in progress. And even though we all secretly know this and long for the days we ran barefoot and laughed at silly jokes, we never  really admit it. We even help our kids grow up and we take them far, far away from that door of knowing and of miracles!

 

Why can’t we let our kids guide us, and show us the way again? Why can’t we learn from them to love and believe in each other again? Why don’t we let them teach us to laugh when we feel like it and to cry when we are sad? Why don’t we stop and look at the stars when they do? Why don’t we look at simple things and be amazed by them again?

 

I think we will learn greatly if we did!

 

Ouiam

 

Live Quietly Or Be A Thunderstorm

If you want to live your life quietly and privately then that’s great and noble, but I would like to live mine with my shadow in front of me. I want to rebel and push boundaries. I want to rise and fall and be able to appreciate both, the rise and the fall. I want to shout and make my voice heard. I want to fly and reinvent myself each and every day. I want to make my own choices and be responsible for the consequences. I want to be fearless yet allow fear to be my best friend. How about you? Do you want to lead a noble life or do you belong to the world of thunderstorms too?

 

Who defines whether you are successful or not? If your answer is anything but: “myself”, then you might want to take a step back and rethink your answer. If the answer is so or so, then you are making a choice to fall, because no one can know you better than you do! Thousands and thousands of people would gladly scrutinize and criticize every single step you take and mark it as a failure, or as a “not good enough”, but does it matter? If you know that even when you fail you are adding value to your life, you are enriching it and making it worth living, then you are a winner no matter what!

 

When you look down at yourself or your skills, you are then giving a free pass to everyone on this planet to do the same exact thing. When you think that you aren’t good enough, pretty enough, strong enough, smart enough…etc., you are welcoming disappointments and heartaches, with open arms. You are making a pact with the devil to take away the joy and sparks from your life. What you will be overlooking is the fact that you never promised anyone that you’ll be perfect. You never told the universe that you’ll be a great mother, wife, sister, daughter, employee, …etc. We put so much pressure on ourselves that we get lost in the middle of the game, we become our worst enemies. We forget that the most important virtue of all is self-forgiveness. Instead of constantly reminding ourselves of how we suck, maybe we can spread positive vibes coming from a place of kind, encouraging and motherly love. Every time we open our mouths to say something negative, maybe we can say a prayer of love instead.

 

I heard somewhere someone saying: “Take 10 seconds a day to think of someone you know, or even someone you don’t know -it could be anyone, the cashier at the supermarket, the old woman crossing the road next to you, the young man sitting next to you at the café…etc. Think of them and wish them happiness, truly and genuinely wish them to be happy” Try it … Now! Close your eyes, think of someone, ANYONE, and wish them all the happiness in the world…. Yes, that’s what I am talking about… You are smiling already! Can you do it twice, three, four times a day? I tried it and it transformed my days!  How about if you wish YOURSELF happiness? Do it few times a day and see the outcome, you might be surprised.

 

The world is a scary place, and it might seem almost impossible to uncover the strange jewels that are hidden within each one of us, yet it is our duty to do so!  Whether we want to live quietly and privately or we want to take the biggest bite we could of this delicious life, loudly and cheerfully, we still need to be our own BBFs, we need to learn how to love ourselves no matter how bad we think we are.  Hard to transfer this from a blog post to reality, yes I know, but every day is a chance to work on it, to try, to do the best we can, and that’s all that matters.

 

Ouiam

Sharing Souls.

I am a firm believer that the people we meet in our life are destined to cross our path, each with a mission. Some missions are simple and entertaining and some others can be daunting and excruciating. Some might add value to our lives and some might change us forever and some others might cause us great pain and suffering in order to learn a life lesson.

Sometime we meet people for the first time, yet we feel that we have known them for a very long time, and here I wonder, did we really know them before? In a different life? A different era? And they show up again in this life as a manifestation of love? To finish a story?! We meet someone, and we immediately like them, we want to befriend them, we want to get to know them and explore their souls. We don’t know why but we’re hunted by the idea of having them in our life –again- Mostly the feeling is reciprocated which can only strengthen the theory.

Those souls we meet and are attracted to, those souls who can make ours so warm and happy, those soulmates, and I don’t only mean “soulmate” as in a love relationship, I also mean friends who complete us, who make us a better version of ourselves, who finish our sentences, who can detect the faintest note of sadness in our voice when we’re sad and beaten. How many can one have? I think I am one of the lucky ones to have witnessed many manifestations of love throughout my life. Many souls who have mastered the art of blending in with mine and have created beautiful work of art. Yet our souls and bodies are always a work in progress, as we keep on evolving and changing, our needs, ideas, and feelings keep on changing too, and our souls need more space to grow and more mates to thrive. Sometimes we are so blessed and lucky to grow and evolve hand in hand with our many soulmates, we go through life holding hands and smiling like little kids, and sometimes their time in our life ends and we all move to the next chapter, because their mission has been completed!

This reminds me a little bit of marriage, and when old couples who have celebrated many decades of matrimony, are asked “How did you manage to love and live with the same person for this long?”. This question doesn’t make any sense to me, because that husband and that wife are not the same people from all these decades ago! Everyday we wake up a little different than the previous one. Each day we learn new things about ourselves that we didn’t know before, and so does our partner. Within 5 or 6 years we are completely different than the two people who met long time ago and fell in love! Yet, as we learn new things about ourselves and our partners, our relationship grows and evolves with us, to fit our current needs, hopes and fears. And only those who open their hearts and souls and embrace each other every single day, with all the baggage they come with and the baggage waiting for them in the future, can make it and can live together happily for years and years!

Acceptance is the key! Knowing and admitting that our thoughts, opinions and feelings are never stable, and so are the ones of the people around us. No one knows what will tomorrow bring, yet we know what we are now –in the moment- The only thing we own and control is now. Being aware and in tune with our souls and bodies is a blessing and a great testimony of love. Admitting that every person in our life can add a little something to the work in progress we are, knowing that our experiences and our stories might be the life-saving anchor to many people around us without us even noticing. Listening (really listening) to people when they talk, listening with our souls and hearts and not only ears. Listening and letting our soul drown in the greatness of other people’s souls, only then we will accept and love unconditionally.

Ouiam